The Single Girl Diaries | I Challenged Myself To Tinder For A Month

Hello Lovelies! If there was ever anything I learnt from single life, it's that I hate Tinder. Hate admittedly is a strong word, but it sums up my feelings towards the app perfectly. Me and Tinder have had a pretty on-off relationship. We met for the first time out of curiosity, then again desperately after a breakup, and then got back together one last time out of sheer loneliness. And that one last time, I vowed it would be the last. I'd met a guy there who'd messed me around, and it was the final straw. From that day onward, I would never use Tinder AGAIN. But then clever ol' me came up with a plan. I'd challenge myself to Tinder for a month, and share all the hilarity with you on my blog. After all how can you get hurt if you're just using the app as a joke for the sake of 'journalism'? It all seemed like one amazing plan, there was just one problem, I only lasted a week... So sit down, grab a cup of tea and I'll tell you a Tinder tale. 

It all started typically enough, with a plethora of frustrating conversations. One of the things you have to understand is that in the land of Tinder, the chosen language is ambiguity so being on the same page as someone is a matter of legend. 99% of the time you'll start with small talk, and usually this will end with either more small talk or a rather shady proposal. And, No, even a hotel room at Travel Lodge doesn't make me want to sleep with you, thanks for trying though. But after lots of swiping, you do occasionally find some gems. The majority of the guys would ask me if I like Sushi (you know because I study Japanese) and after hearing that I did were surprisingly pleased. I seemed to attract all the guys with wanderlust who cared more about hearing about Japan than about me! See, I'm just constantly outshone by my degree #firstworldproblems.

There was also the guy who asked me to be his Christmas present, which hey I appreciated because I love Christmas but then he followed it with 'oi nudes' and I realised it was never meant to be...

And then there were the messages I read out of context: 'I beat my girlfriend one time and she never talked to me again.'

Don't worry, he was only referring to Mario Kart. Phew.

But one of my favourite people I met on Tinder was Mac and Cheese Guy (named so because he makes a good Mac and Cheese, he didn't like the nickname though...). He was one of those rare Tinder guys who makes it all worth it. He had an abundance of banter, and was willing to mock the whole process. I confided with him that I was writing this article, so if you ever do stumble across it Mac and Cheese guy, let me know.

But you're probably wondering, did anything else come from Tinder apart from repetitive strain injury from constant swiping and small talk about Japan? Well there was one thing that changed it all.

I met Tinder Darcy. 

I met Tinder Darcy one evening and we just hit it off. We talked first on Tinder, then he smoothly explained his Tinder wasn't working so within less than an hour he already had my number. Sometimes guys are just annoyingly smooth like that, and it's always so fishy. As you might have guessed, the conversation continued and continued and we found ourselves sleep deprived at 6.30 am finally calling it a night. It was one of those rare life moments, when you find yourself talking to someone and just have a spark. 

When I woke up the cycle continued and we talked till you guessed it 6.30 am all over again. And by this point I was wondering what the hell I was doing with my life, but I just couldn't help that I got on so well with this guy. I wasn't looking for anything, just some cringey messages I could relay in an article later but Tinder Darcy started to make me rethink everything. I certainly wasn't going to jump into a relationship no thank you, but Tinder Darcy was starting to make me want to because I was simply loving talking to him. By this point also, I hadn't looked at Tinder since I met him. I was REALLY in trouble. 

Anyway the next night Tinder Darcy was at a party, so I found myself alone for a few hours because apparently I have nothing to do with my life. When you're waiting for a text from someone, it suddenly feels like your whole world revolves around that and it is honestly one of the most frustrating feelings in the world. But sure enough later he messaged me apologising for when he hadn't messaged me, because apparently playing it cool is a thing of the past and Drunk Tinder Darcy suggested we phone each other. This was the big test, would we get on over the phone or were we just really good at texting? Nervously I picked up the phone, and as if by magic it all felt natural. It was weird, I felt like I was talking to an old friend, albeit an old friend I really fancied. 

I started telling him my insecurities. Like how I seem to have a billion phobias (like seriously, scaredy cat right here) and everyone thinks I'm pathetic and how I have a ridiculous obsession with Hello Kitty and everyone seems to judge me. It was like I had a checklist of possible reasons why he wouldn't like me, and I needed to check every single one. But unlike most people he seemed to understand, and for once someone actually made me feel a little more normal. Perhaps I'm just used to the men in my life putting me down, but this really struck me. He just made me feel comfortable with who I am and sadly enough that is a rare thing in my love life. We ended up telling each other we liked each other over the phone, and it was honestly just really cute. Now considering me and Tinder Darcy's track record, it will probably come as no surprise we stayed up till 8am talking. Yes that's right 8am! And the best part? Guess who had to wake up at 8am... 

So fast forwarding past the sleep deprived day where we of course continued talking, and another very similar day we get to the day where we both finally met. *Cue dramatic music* We met at a station near me at about 6 which is honestly an awful idea. Watching so many people leave a train station is mind numbing. They all start to look like the person you're waiting for, and it just makes you feel incredibly awkward. But he did arrive eventually, only half an hour late (not still bitter about that part, I promise). 

And you guessed it, from the get go we got on, even if there was a lot of nervous giggling from yours truly. I could hardly even look him in the face I was so flustered. We went to Starbucks which is my favourite place in the world, and ended up snuggling and being completely judged by everyone else there. And honestly it was weird because I couldn't really comprehend why or how I felt so comfortable around this guy. I just did and it felt so weirdly natural. We left Starbucks after getting kicked out at 10pm and we wandered around holding hands and it was really nice. But from this point it all spectacularly fell apart. 

Sorry to disappoint anyone who was rooting for Tinder Darcy. 

To cut a very long story short, he wasn't looking for anything serious, most likely because of his recent breakup. So it ended all just like that and the girl who had already deleted her tinder account felt just that little bit stupid. But hey, can you really blame me?

And you know what? Deep down I still miss him, and yes there's still a part of me that wishes he would change his mind. Not because I want a boyfriend, because honestly I don't want one anymore, it's just because I want him. I just miss talking to him. But I don't blame him, because I understand completely. I've been at the point he's at now, I just wish he'd taken a chance on me because it could have been something amazing. But at the same time, it's his loss (even if I don't really believe it). Maybe this was my opportunity to realise my own worth and actually start recognising that I have something to offer. Here's to having girl power. After all, what's so wrong with being single anyway? 

And so just like that The Single Girl Diaries were born.

Thought of the day: 'But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself.' - Carrie Bradshaw

Man crush: Benedict Cumberbatch because SHERLOCK. The latest New Year ep has definitely rekindled my obsession. If you don't love a bit of Batch something is wrong with you and if you haven't seen Sherlock WATCH IT NOW.

Perk of being single: Being able to trial dating apps/sites for the lols. Not that I want to, but at least I have the option!

Thank you for reading lovelies! Seeing as I had such a positive response to my first The Single Girl Diaries post, you can now join me on the journey of a hopeless romantic with an even more hopeless love life every Sunday, 12pm GMT. 

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