The Single Girl Diaries | 1,000 Reasons Not To Date Me

Hello Lovelies! Remember in my first diary post how I said this series could end up epically backfiring, well I'm pretty sure this post will come back and haunt me one day. Sorry future me. Also if you're wondering about the context of the above photo, it's actually one of my prom photos featuring dorky smile from yours truly and my ridiculously stunning friend Mary. This has no relevance at all to today's post, I just thought it would be nice to actually share a photo that has me in it (they are a rarity). 

But anyways, I know what you're thinking. 1,000 reasons, really Vicky? As self deprecating as I am, even I wouldn't go that far. Maybe it's just me, but does anyone else have a list of things about themselves they're scared to admit because they make you feel epically undateable? Well I have one in my head, and I definitely check them off when talking to a new guy. Thing is I've mastered the art of flagging up things to guys before they even have a chance to find them out. And unfortunately they always seem to come out all at once, in epically awkward word vomit which explains exactly why I am sitting here right now talking about being single. 

Here are some of the reasons I would make an amazing (questionable) girlfriend:

1. The Hello Kitty Obsession

Surprisingly people don't react that weirdly to this one. Maybe they almost expect I'll have a weird Japanese addiction because I study the language. Who knows? Just don't expect me to grow out of it. At best I'll have my own guilty secret closet like Monica, except rather than mess it will just be a closet filled with Hello Kitty. I take crazy cat lady to a whole other level.

And if you don't believe me, the three words used to describe me in my year book were 'Hello Kitty Obsessed'

YES, really. 

2. I Don't Drink (And Yes, That Means Never)

When you admit you don't drink, it opens a trapdoor of misconceptions and trust me I have heard them all. The first is that I'm boring, the second is that I quietly judge everyone who drinks and the third is I never let my hair down. But want to know a secret? If you're around lots of drunk people, it's actually incredibly easy to work off their energy and make a complete fool about yourself. Being second hand drunk is actually a thing, well at least with me it is. Acting like an absolute fool just comes naturally.

But the thing is even after explaining this to guys, it's often a complete deal breaker. Two of my best friends even said they'd never date someone who didn't drink in a million years. Thanks guys. Honestly though, it's really not a big deal so it will continue to baffle me about why people care so much. I'm not yawn inducing level boring, I promise. 

But don't worry, I do have my own addiction. Instead of drinking I have an unhealthy obsession with coffee, mainly Starbucks. What can I say, Starbucks is just much more reliable than any man could ever be. Come to think of it my perfect man would be a Barista (best of both worlds). 

Also a Starbucks Barista flirted with me on Friday - it was a momentous occasion. 

3. I Hate It When People Take Photos Of Me

Now this is something I'd actually change about myself, because there is a serious lack of photos of me. Like honestly if you go on my facebook there is a complete time gulf where I did not let anyone take photos, and then about 1,000 photos of me 11 years old when Apple's Photobooth was the coolest thing to ever happen. The thermal filter was just legendary. 

In fact nowadays, I have mastered the covering my hand with my face pose as soon as I see any cameras. I basically treat any friends or family like the Paparazzi, nope, no photos for you. But hey I'm not proud of it and I'm trying to improve. This just tends to put guys off because it shows how insecure I can be, but honestly can I help it? Not really. I'll just have to avoid dating any photographers, they would hate me. 

4. I'm Scared Of Everything

Irrational fears are one of my specialities. I just have this ability to become scared of the weirdest things. It's like a superpower, except instead of allowing me to conquer the world it's debilitating. One of my fears is a fear of heights, although in fairness I actually get Vertigo so you can't really blame me for this one. Then I hate swimming, because I have a fear of drowning. There's also my fear of needles, but who actually likes injections? 

But the worst fear by a long way, is my fear of opening cans. And to make things even better my favourite food is canned tuna... My life is a tragic existence. 

5. I'm Sentimental and Hopelessly Romantic 

Ok so this really depends on the guy but admitting you're romantic or showing you're super sentimental can scare guys away like there is no tomorrow. It's not like I'll be writing you love letters, because hey we have email now (just kidding) but I will get soppy on you. And soppy Vicky, well she just gets sentimental. I just like telling people how much I love them OK. Don't hate. And this presents itself in many forms, the overly sentimental gift, the cheesy texts and the constant reminder of how amazing you are. RUN MEN, now while you still can. 

Jokes aside, what dating jerks in my life has told me if anything, is that if someone starts pointing out all the reasons they don't like you, run for the hills because they aren't worth it. I am more than happy to tell you all my quirks, but for me they aren't serious reasons you shouldn't date me. I may have lots of quirks, but I won't settle for someone who doesn't accept them because you know what I'm not changing myself for anybody.

Sorry. 

(And btw, you never should either).

Thought of The Day: 'A girl should be two things: who and what she wants.'

Man Crush: Jack Savoretti because his song Catapult is JUST beautiful (and he is too). Like seriously listen to it now!

Perk of Being Single: Not having to worry about buying or arranging something nice for Valentine's which is a perk, and not a perk at the same time. Accio boyfriend? Hey was worth a try.

Thank you for reading lovelies! Do let me know if you have a list at all, would be intrigued to see if this is just me or not!

P.S Lovelies I have a little challenge for you, dare you accept it. This week seeing as Valentine's Day is fast approaching, I decided to challenge myself to tell as many of my friends how much they mean to me and how much I love them. Cue cheesiness and probably a lot of awkward replies, but hey you can read about what happens in my next post. See you next Sunday 12pm GMT!

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